Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Review: 2012

Let me give everyone some tips if you want to get the most out of this movie. There are basically four spectacular FX scenes that you need to see that totals about 30 to 40 minutes of screen time. Now the movie itself is about 2 hours and 40 minutes, so you can do the math. The opening prologue is all talk about what will happen to Earth and it gets kinda old real fast. Then comes the destruction of California by the mother of all earthquakes. It's visually impressive watching the state just get ripped in half. But after that attention getter, things get bogged down with more talk as our hero played by John Cusack, who can drive a limo like no one else can. I mean, the dude outraces the quake in Californa while everyone else bites the dust. Anyway he has a plan to get his family to China, where the world governments are building these massive ships...arks if you will, to survive the oncoming destruction. Cue the next good scene at Yellowstone Park, where a volcano goes active and lays waste to the entire area. Then comes, you guessed it more boring talk before what I believe is the film's showstopper. It's money shot if you will. The giant tsunami that takes out Washington, DC. It delivers with a super sized aircraft carrier, the JFK, right to the doorstep of the White House. All the president can do is just close his eyes and say goodbye. That shot right there is awesome. Then the climax which involves those massive ships trying to keep people alive. 2012 is pure fantasy and all sense of realism is quickly jettisoned by the first act of the film. Cusack survives so many situations that, it becomes almost comical. The film is way too long and has some of the most awful dialogue you will ever hear ,even for a disaster film. Bonus points though for Thandie Newton who looks stunning as the President's daughter and can speak very fluently in French with no problems. So if you want to see 2012, just cue up those four main scenes on your DVD chapter list: California, Yellowstone Park, Washington, and the finale and that should be all you need to see. And you only waste about 40 minutes of your time. You can't beat that.
C-

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